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Development of bigger and better ships such as the steam ship allowed maritime expansion. In addition, a higher sense of Nationalism pushed several major nations to resort to Imperial Expansion, despite the indigenous people native to the land. Although some indigenous peoples may have accommodated foreign invaders, because indigenous people wanted to remain independent and others raised armies to defend against the invaders, therefore indigenous people reactions to state expansion differed greatly but were mainly wishes to remain independent.

The Hawaiian Queen and a Javanese aristocrat strongly disliked the rule of their invaders. In document 4, the Hawaiian queen announces her protest of the U.S. takeover of her lands. Part of the Hawaiian Queen’s complaint was the lack of compensation for her land. On the other hand, the United States accomplished the Louisiana Purchase and payed in return for a large sum of land. In document 5, the Javanese aristocrat dislikes the way the Dutch rule and how they demand to be treated. He had to sit by and watch as the Dutch demanded to be treated as a Javanese ruler.

The Koreans that believed in Tonghak and Ethiopians were prepared to defend themselves against their invaders. In document 2, the Tonghak believers describe their need to raise an army in order to exterminate the Japanese invaders and restore tranquility. The American Revolution required the Americans to raise an army in order to fight off their British occupiers much like the Koreans. In document 3, the Ethiopians are depicted having defeated the Italians in a battle. At the time the Italians were trying to colonize Africa and take over Ethiopian lands, therefore the Ethiopians felt the need to defend their land against invaders.

If I am reading your intended arguments correctly, you basically have two arguments some accommodated and some resisted. Please reread your “Although… because and therefore” statement. You’ve crammed two independent but related thoughts and it weakens the strength of both arguments. Example: While various responses to European state expansion existed, indigenous response can be broken down to two main categories, accommodation and resistance. THEN you can use independence as your context. The context is… indigenous response must be understood in the context of their intention…independence which is a global theme during this time period.

From a structural standpoint in your first paragraph, I’d like to see a more clearly stated topic sentence that clearly reflects your argument. You jump right into the document without saying how it is evidence for your argument (or again, what your argument is). This whole first paragraph is about proving the first argument you make in your thesis. Document 4 is an example of resistance. So, you are using it to prove your argument that resistance was a common response to state expansion. Again, make a topic sentence that states that argument first, then use your documents to prove it.

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