Greta Thungberg Essay Feedback request

I would greatly appreciate any feedback or a numerical score as it would make me feel more prepared for the exam.

you get the thesis point - good job! Great job with commentary in the first paragraph like "“this guides the audience to become more aware of how truly unjust the U.N’s actions are as they affect everybody including themselves.” but PLEASE make sure not to misspell the author’s last name (Thunberg, not Thungberg).

I think you could’ve gone a bit more in depth on the second body paragraph where u say “The emphasis on the science works to continue to establish not only her credibility but give her argument something larger to stand on then just her own passionate emotions.” - expand on how this credibilty “persuades the united nations to further act to create a stronger solution” --> therefore i think i’m leaning towards a 3 on evidence & commentary because your commentary feels a bit uneven.

I don’t think you get the sophistication point but a 1-3-0 is still very good!

Thank you for the advice. I feel a lot better about the AP Exam. I’ll spend a little less time on the intro to help draw out the commentary on my second body paragraph.

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