Would this outside evidence in bold get the point?

Ottoman reform movements also produced racist nationalistic ideals which focused on warding off minority ethnicities by reformers groups like the Young Turks who thought that these minority races inside the ottoman Empire was weakening it and this is proven in document 7 where the author mentions how about 12,000 Bulgarians inside the Ottoman Empire including women and children were killed by Ottomans. This is a significant change to the way people viewed each other in society caused by nationalistic ideals part of the Ottoman reform movement.

I was using the this bit about the Young Turks to help me support my analysis of document 7.

This reads more like context to Doc 7 than it does as outside evidence. In order to make the reader see it as outside evidence, I’d add another sentence or two— you usually want more explanation for outside evidence. For example, why did the Young Turks believe this? What kind of effect did they have on society/the government? How did they justify their beliefs? You don’t have to answer all these questions, just trying to suggest some to think about.

Hope this helps!

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